Countdown to a New Life--Day 7

It’s Sunday morning, October 19, 2008 here in Tulsa, and I sit thinking with so much on my mind. Precisely one week from today, I will be leaving Tulsa, Oklahoma to fly to Houston, Texas for processing in preparation for working abroad. Part of me is excited about the opportunity to experience life abroad and travel to places I have only dreamed of visiting. Yet the other part of me is somewhat sad at the fact that for the first time in 28 years, I will be leaving my kids behind on their own for one year.

My children are now grownups, each has their own personality, and in my eyes, each is the most beautiful, unique, and intelligent and loving child a mother could ask for. I am thankful God granted me the opportunity to be mother to them while on this journey called life. Although my children are my heart and soul, I am saddened at the fact that we have not spent more time together as the time draws nearer for me to depart. Perhaps they too are struggling with their emotions of my leaving them.

My heart is heavy, and I want nothing more than to feel the warmth of my children and grandchildrens' arms about me. To hear the sounds of their laughter, to see the joy upon their faces, and the reminiscing in their eyes as we remember the good and bad times shared. My children and I have come through so many trials over the years, and yet I am so ever grateful that through all of them, God has kept us strong.

I know that for my daughters, my leaving is hardest because they are single mother’s themselves, and they have relied upon me the most. But yet, I know without a doubt they are strong women who come from a lineage of strong, confident, and intelligent black women; my daughters will be just fine. I worry most about my baby, a boy, who is now 20 years old. He just graduated high school in May 2008, and this is his first attempt at being an adult. All he has truly ever known is his two sisters and I. He will continue to live in our home here, and I pray that God guides his footsteps, helps him to become a man, and protects him in every way.

Despite my feelings, I know that God is Lord over all, and He will keep my family and I safe through our journeys. I have walked long enough with God to know that sometimes, I have to encourage myself when life seems to come at you fast. This job opportunity is an experience to give me more insight about life around the world, and not everyone gets such an opportunity. Father God, I welcome and thank you for your grace, goodness and mercy. It is by your goodness that I prevail.

--Oluwakemi