Well today I bought myself a new journal. The kids and I went shopping at the Mall and I picked up a few items we found. I really hadn't intended to spend any money but it felt good doing something with the kids. I'm sitting here now at home out on my apartment's balcony enjoying the evening air and thoughts of being with myself and thinking about my life.
"J" talked to me again about my moving permanently to Boston. I'm still undecided based on all the events which have taken place between the two of us. Perhaps Boston may be a really good place for me to begin again in a more successful way.
I've felt okay today about life. I ended up having a fight with my daughter "K" today but then again what's new. "K" seems to have so many pressing issues going on in her life but they're issues she has to resolve. I can't fix her life, even though I wish I could. I'm just thankful for an opportunity within my own life to give myself love and support. Yea, there are still many things I need to work out within me but I'll be fine, I know I will.
The kids for the moment seem happy and I'm glad they like our new apartment. It feels good to be alive, good to have my own place to call home and the opportunity to love life and enjoy God's blessings. I ask myself "what am I thankful for this day?" Well to begin with....
- Life with the health of my own being
- Home with all its comforts
- Friendship in its truest sense
I'm glad I can sit outdoors without being eaten alive by mosquitoes. The comfort of a job, a car, food, money in my pocket and the chance to have all I need. For these things I am grateful.
Ever evolving that is how I view life. Every day I'm given another opportunity to discover my self and what I've been put here to do. My son, "K" will be here at weeks end, home from Germany. One thing's certain, I've gotta get past buying into or allowing other folks drama, emotion or energy into my life. My kids are grown and as much as I want to give them hope and a better life, they can only do this for themselves as adults.
I love the sound of the wind chimes blowing in the wind. It's peaceful here where I live at right now. I think that God was definitely guiding me in finding this place. I ask God for strength, wisdom, guidance and grace in finding my way to the truth that is for my highest good.
Thoughts of taking some time off work to go to Boston for a few months are prevalent in my mind. But for now I'll just keep seeking truth, guidance and strength in the quest for my success.
Oluwakemi
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